Update: You should also check out my video on the psychology of verbal mirroring.
Hey, this is my first YouTube video, so be kind! If you have trouble loading the video, you can watch it here. I recorded this today because I literally just used this technique and I’m interested to know if you are interested in seeing more of this type of thing.
I discovered this simple body language technique from a $0.99 iTunes audiobook about four years ago, and it has been an incredibly effective in-person sales technique! Basically, the technique, called “mirroring” allows your body language and your client’s body language to be in sync. This helps them like you more (because they think you’re like them), and it also helps you get them to literally open up to your sales presentation. Awesome, right?!?
This technique uses some pretty interesting social psychology that shows that we like and respond best to people who are who are most like ourselves. I’m not exactly sure why this is (there is research to support it), but I just try to remember that “like attracts like.” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone into a meeting with a “scary boss” and left the room thirty minutes later with him feeling like I was a good friend and ally. And trust me, I’m no expert, so if I can do, you can too!
By the way, I have a new newsletter that I’m starting (over on the right side of my website). If you haven’t yet, you should subscribe because I’m going to try to put some really awesome “off blog” content there just for the newsletter subscribers (I’ll be kicking this thing into gear around mid-March).
Anyway, let me know if/when you try this sneaky mirroring technique and how well it works for you.
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Whoa great tip – thanks! I will have to try to use that in my next meeting. How does it work? Is there a signal you look for to know that your mirroring will work? Thanks again!
Let me know if it works for you, Brian! There isn’t a signal per se, but I typically try to mirror someone for a minute or so and then I try a small gesture to see how they react (like picking up my pen or shifting my weight slightly).
The great thing about mirroring is that you can’t really get it wrong. If it doesn’t work the first time, it just means the subject’s subconscious and yours are a little more out of sync. In this case, you just return to their position and mirror them for a little while longer. I’ve used this technique to crack some tough cookies. In then end, they almost always break!